Tuesday, July 01, 2008

boundaries, nursing, garden pictures

there are not enough hours in the days i swear. now that david is in school at ohio state i never see him. when he is home i have to ask him to watch/distract/entertain/referee the kids while *i* work or heaven forbid i have a moment to myself. i think i had one of those last week though somewhere! :) mothers understand this, especially if you stay at home. it's like, where is the line? so often a mother, and again especially those who are at home full time, looses herself in her mothering. i do not feel lost but i do feel starved for things beyond parenting, wifey-ing, doing for others. yesterday (i retract my above statement about a long-ago me-moment) the kids took a nap while i was at my parents house cat-sitting for them while they vacation. i was shocked at the freedom! with no dishes to wash, no laundry to fold/put on the line/wash/put away, no floor to sweep, diapers to fold, toys to put away i was practically giddy with opportunity. so i sat down and read the paper! AND i had a cup of tea! and it was hot the whole time!! the point is that i'm over extended and there is no end in sight. maybe 5 years when david graduates college?

this was day 4 of 5 when we had no hot water because the storms killed our hot water heater. pigpen baby!

i have started putting boundaries up with olive regarding her [rampant] nursing. i love that relationship very much but that girl abuses the sign for nurse something fierce. she often will make attempts to forego an entire meal, or rather pick at it knowing that i will nurse her afterward. like today, it is approximately 2:15 and she has had nothing but raspberries that she and auggie gleaned from the garden while we were there and a handful of graham crackers. on top of that issue she is a bruiser. have i ever mentioned that? well she is. i cannot believe that we have gone 15 months with just one trip to the ER with that one because she is a risk taking, tomboy of a baby who will climb on the table and dance, jump off the couch, get into some pretty physical altercations with her brother who outweighs her by at least 15 lbs. her teenage years should be fun *face palm* the point is she falls down and bumps this and bruises that and wants comfort in the way that is most soothing, nursing. that does not mean i use this method every time, simply that she shows a great preference for it. and then at night, oh night time! it is nursing gymnastics and sometimes aerobics if she is feeling particularly rambunctious. i am not encouraging her to wean, that is something i want us to agree upon together when we are both ready. but come on, i want a little physical freedom! this entry is going to make me cry someday when she actually is no longer nursing, i just know it!

ill leave you with photos from today's garden.

digging up beets


sunflower heads coming soon!


hot peppers

i will love you forever if you can tell me what this is. the tag said cabbage when i planted it but uhhh that ain't no cabbage i've ever seen. halp!

just look at that luscious lettuce!

i harvested maybe a pint today. YUM


Anonymous said...

I can totally relate to the nursing demand a toddler can enforce over a (totally exhausted) mother. My daughter, Ruby, is 14 months as well and I think the nurse sign is her most favorite action all day... well that and climbing, and for that matter pinching. But I digress, I think it just has something to do with the age, you know, trying to find their own autonomy while still so reliant on the comforts of Mom. At least with this being my second child I know there is an end in sight... but the end is a sad thought too, ohh well! Best, ERIN

jenny mae. said...

gosh im almost regretting teaching her that sign. allllll day. and then i feel that she feels she's being rejected when i say no/put boundaries up. it does not change the fact that they need to be in place but still... her reaction is one of heartbreak

Anonymous said...

When I put boundaries on nursing know that both of my girls went through the "rejection" stage and I don't know your personal parenting philosophy, but we are an AP family and I think that the my constant communication and presence really helped to understand that not nursing now does not mean not nursing ever... Hang in there, you are not alone:) ERIN

Anonymous said...

it looks like garlic

saraH said...

i think the mystery plant is some sort of bean. snap beans perhaps? but its def. not garlic. good luck with your mystery food!

Alia said...

Just as you said a few months back--Swap "Olive" with "Jonah"

*face palm*