Monday, December 01, 2008

i am what i am

both the kids have mild colds. i whipped them up some jewish penicillin today. (can i say that even though im not jewish?) olive is currently on her second now third bowl. i kept her home from church yesterday, much to her chagrin, because her nose was a big snot ball. i am so blessed to have a healthy family. we recently stopped being able to afford health insurance - though to attend OSU david has to have it personally. it's funny though, david is a little freaked (putting it mildly) that the kids and i are uninsured, that is how he is. i on the other hand feel mostly fine with it. besides the time olive went to the ER after supposedly swallowing a screw she's never even seen a medical doctor. the only medical care she has ever received is regular chiropractic adjustments from my dad and the initial post-birth once over by my midwife. she's never had anything more than a sniffle, never puked (well besides reflux as a babe), never had a scratch that a bandaid couldnt help, nor ear infection or anything else like that. augustine has had two? ear infections in his life. neither were confirmed by a doctor, he was just complaining his ear hurt. so we did a week of tylenol, mullein flower extract-garlic-olive oil in the ear and that was the end of it. augustine hasnt been to a doctor since he was 9 or 12 months old and that was simply for a well check. i feel happy about such good and healthy children and yet i feel like im "in the closet" about my kid's history with(out) doctor checks. some look at such a low-key approach as neglect or some symptom of ignorance, poverty, etc. but im of the opinion that i am a human that is capable of taking care of other humans when they need it. i mean i can weigh my kid, and who cares how much they weigh really? i think i'd notice if there was something majorly wrong with my child. when my abilities are exhausted i then consult a specialist (meaning a doctor of medicine) there are few questions that books and to a lesser degree the internet can't answer for a person if they just seek out the answers. im not outright cynical or prejudice against doctors, i think they have a function for sure. but i am not going to waste their time or mine on minor stuff that i can handle. but then again im really laid back about this kind of thing. it doesnt make me a better or worse parent - though i've heard both of those applied and shook my head at both. anyways, that's just what works for us. oh and ill shoot a little thumbs up to the book How to Raise a Healthy Child in Spite of Your Doctor.

my hairstylist quit her salon and is going back to school. i called today to book an appointment - i shall not turn 27 with such a mop - and apparently im invited to her house tomorrow for a cut. ugh it's 25 minutes away though! but she's been doing my hair for years and she's a friend, and it's not as if i get my haircut all the time. 3? 4? times per year at most im guessing. all those folks who've given my compliments lately on my hair, fooled you!

i've been an emotional person lately, moreso than usual. last night i sat down with david and said "from now until... well forever just do not acknowledge that i am crying during movies. it will only embarrass me." i cry at movies a lot. any movie portraying such and such joe hero overcoming the odds/giving it his or her all/going the distance/sacrificing for the betterment of someone else dude, explosive water works. lord of the rings, don't even get me started. i could and have boo hoo'd through the entire 10+ hours of that film. omg the shire is in trouble! i feel so sorry for golum! i can't believe sauron cut down some ents! arwen forsakes immortality for aragorn! helms deep is saved! it's totally embarrassing but totally unavoidable too so please, just ignore it and let me wipe my nose on my sleeve in peace.

17 comments:

rae said...

Aw man, LOTR, that can be a tear jerker. Having kids did something weird to me, these days I start tearing up SO easily. argh. :p

It's good to read your blog about your kids, that's pretty much how I am with my girls but my husband has me second guessing myself a lot. I read a lot of books and look things up online a LOT. I was worried about Ryan's ears a while ago and got the mullein garlic olive oil drops... of course, she's also doing some serious teething.

Anyway, it's really encouraging to read your blog today! :)

ELINDSIAH said...

I feel so relieved to read your perspective on parenting and doctors. I too haven't taken eli since he was 9 months? and mostly cause I felt shameful about not regularly taking him. Dr. Backes doesn't seem to mind so I know its alright but there is some guilt when i don't know how eli's weight/height has progressed when asked. Trust our mama guts!

jenny mae. said...

i also feel that weird sense as if i should feel ashamed. i mean if our children were sick and we denied them care, that is an entirely different situation.

Anonymous said...

I feel a similar "in the closet" shame, too! My kids haven't been to the doctor for checkups for 2.5yrs- since my oldest was 3 and youngest was 2 months. I don't see the need if they are healthy, and I think I can tell if something is wrong with them to know when to see a doctor.. also like you. But we don't tell people this because we don't want to looked down on or lectured. Thanks for posting this.

aceofhats said...

Well sis... that explains why I'm sick this week! Ha! just kidding. I mean I am indeed sick, but its only natural for all those people (think= Thanksgiving and shopping days) to influence each other some way. I rarely go to the doctor, but I think that it's important to identify things like alergies and asthma early on. They really did a number on me when I was little and we had such limited means of detection back then (1985...) Sometimes a little immunity buildup is a good thing too. Bubby

rachaeldear said...

1) about the kids not seeing the doctor... did i ever tell you the story about how nurses in the doctors' office in which i work nearly physically wrangled me into getting a flu shot? i told them i dont necessarily believe in vaccines and i got the "but rachael, i'm a doctor" speech... i've also heard doctors in my office make fun of patients because they chose not to vaccinate their children or had homebirths... (i'm only there to pay the bills)
2) because of distance, i've been going to a local girl to get my hair done, but i'm pretty sure i've decided to return to my good friend danielle for hair cuttery, and she is a 45 minute drive...
3) i also do not want anyone to see me cry during movies. i often make several bathroom trips while watching "extreme home makeover." it even made eric cry the other day!

Anonymous said...

I, for one am sOOOOOOOOO proud of my girl-keep on 'keeping on with that attitude about doctors in general-they, of course, mean well but you are so very well informed-trust your gut!! Jane A

mandi said...

it seems to me that parents, like us, have to be extra diligent about our kid's health. if there is a sniff or a tug of the ear, we go through all of the hoops to find out what is wrong. so to be looked at as being negligent is so discouraging, and SOOOO wrong. i'm with you- if it seems out of my ability, i will go seek out help, but for the occassional sickness, i feel capable. i bought one of those little mommy md otoscopes. love it! i feel so professional. now if only i could snag a white coat...and some scrubs with kittens hugging frogs...

jenny mae. said...

josh - if either of the beebs showed signs of something beyond run of the mill stuff, i'd take them in a heartbeat. ergo the trip where olive might have swallowed a screw. BEYOND MY SKILLZ :) id never deny them true medical care. you know that, not saying that is what you are implying.

rachael - yup, i totally felt that way when we were taking augustine to pediatricians. like we were quietly being joked about. there was definitely a tension every single appointment. like "*sigh* why won't you people just listen!" and the thing is i DID listen but she would not listen to me nor read any of the articles i had sent to her. i prefer to do the least invasive first, then work into more invasive. plus i looked at the risks of getting ___ shot and not getting _____ shot and either it seemed ridiculous to be fearful of my kid getting something that was overwhelmingly improbable of them contracting or there was just as many reasons TO and to NOT TO so again, defaulted to non-invasive measures.

oh & i gots my hairs cuts today. muy bueno.

Nathan and Aimee said...

Hi Jenny! I found your blog through my friend Kristin and I was just so glad to read this. I have three kids(4,2, and 9mos) and I have so much guilt about not having my youngest vaccinated. He hasn't been to the dr since he was 1 or 2 days old and sometimes I second guess myself, especially since my older two went to the dr for everything and were vaccinated "on schedule". I'm just glad I'm not the only one who doesn't know how much my kid weighs!(we don't have a bathroom scale) Aimee

jenny mae. said...

we dont own one either and in fact i see no point in most folks owning a bathroom scale. that's just me :)

JVH said...

jewish penicillin? I learned something new today, thank you Jenny Mae. I kids havent had colds (yet) this year, i'll have to google the reciepe. I hear ya on the insurance, but i'm the only one with health coverage right now, that's just because i'm pregnant. Still having a homebirth..but what-if's during delivery are scarry. Thanks for the advise!

JVH said...

man,lol!! I thought your remedy was actually a homemade medicine. Oh... chicken noodle soup... shucks ;)

biscuitwitcheese said...

You are a blessed woman to have such healthy children!
I send you and your family well wishes!

Chubz said...

I also don't see the point in knowing your childs weight but we all know that we don't go to the doctor to get weighed (you might as well do it while you are there however)

However people seem to forget that vaccines are the reason we do not have outbreaks of Polio anymore like other countries. There are people who watch their children die of these diseases because it is soo hard for them to get access to such vaccines yet people here choose to not get their children vaccinated at all..maybe thinking that it would be unlikely to happen to my child. But what if it ddoes... what would you do then. Why if your child is playing and gets cut on a rusty nail, resulting in tetanus. Though chicken soup is nice, I doubt it will get rid of Lock jaw.

I don't think you or anyone who choses not to vaccinate is a bad parent ( i almost didn't do them either for fear of autism ) However my husband made a good point about the reason america doesn't suffer from as many diseases as other countries and why we give donations to other countries for access to such shots.

I dont know.. I guess thats my two cents i hope you aren't offended or anything.

jenny mae. said...

my husband and i carefully weighed many things when choosing not to vaccinate our children. such as

- risks for not getting the shots?
- risks for getting them?
- probability of infection?
- severity of infection?
- probability of reactions to shots?
- severity of said reaction to shots?
-general health of our children (ie are they sickly children who's body would be more likely to be damaged by transmission of some disease/virus)

we went shot by shot and came up with one of two scenarios each time - equal reasons to get the shots as not to get the shots or less reasons to get them. and being the type to be less invasive than most probably, we deduced that for our family shots were not going to be part of our medical care at the present time. but should our childrens health take a nose dive and they become immunocompromised in some way or the exposure probabilities go dramatically up with a virus or disease that is very dangerous (polio being a great example, chicken pox not being one) then we would be very willing to revisit the topic. in the case of the people living in countries where they are not only exposed to those kinds of things, i strongly urge those folks to protect themselves with vaccinations. tetanus i would think would be the most common in America because it lives in soil, dust and manure. but proper hygiene following exposure to any of these things almost always ensures that it is killed and thus prevented from making folks sick. i am an avid gardener so that one has concerned me the most honestly, as my kids are always out there with me.

i believe vaccinations are a good thing. they have protected generations of people from further harm. but at this point FOR MY FAMILY the threat of those things currently does not seem to warrant exposing my children to chemicals that we are uncomfortable with injecting into them. again, should the exposure probability or their health change, we'll come back.

and in no way am i offended. i love healthy discussion!! :)

Alia said...

My hubby is the son of a doctor, So not vaxing was completely out of the discussion. Luckily I did not feel TOO strongly about it.

But the real reason I'm commenting is because you said LOTR. How could I not? ;) {sigh}

Incidentally, despite my high recommendation of anything with Viggo Mortensen... maybe you should NOT see "The Road" or "Good" when they are released in 2009. Both will be MEGA tear jerkers in the heartiest of men. Although they should also really be awesome movies.