Wednesday, March 25, 2009

day 3

today's person/people i dont really like but im praying for change is my neighbors. the ones who yell at their kids and parked their car on the lawn while they were moving and i harshly judge them on just about every little thing that i can and scrutinize how different i am from them. of course they woke me up this morning before the sun was up, chatting it up obscenely loud for the hour behind our apartment this morning. i flew to the window and looked out in anger that i was woken up before 6 am by a guy out for a smoke with his buddy but then felt a spiritual "tap tap tap" on my heart reminding me that it was my day to pray over my relationship with the family next door. i am greatly troubled for the little girl that lives next door, i can easily see her as a child of God - but her parents? that is a stretch for my heart. i see the evidence of alcoholism and hear the anger and neglect through our shared walls and i just tighten up thinking about extending a hand of friendship. it's difficult for me to accept the truth - that every person is an object of God's relentless affection, that everyone was created in the image of the Lord, that everyone's mess ups are the same. but. but. hey! that means we are equals! guess what! we are! all have fallen short of the glory of God, end of story. oh but my heart is so tempted to keep some ridiculous list of other people's sins and minimize my own. it's laughable! so today i invite the spirit of redemption to permeate my walls and soak into my heart. reconcile me to my neighbors God!

7 comments:

Jen said...

Love these posts on loving those you don't like!

On a totally unrelated note, I came across this today and it made me think of you.
http://www.guerrillagardening.org/
I love it!

jenny mae. said...

jen where have you been girl! i was just thinking of you on sunday. we went over to the tolentino's for lunch and i was right across the street! anyways I LOVE GUERRILLA GARDENING!!

mandi said...

this made me think of something i wanted to pass on. in a way of encouragement...
i was a teacher before i became a mom. one year i had a little boy that was severely neglected. his clothes were dirty and holey, his body was dirty. in the mornings i'd send him to the bathroom to wash his hands. they'd be wet, but not clean. i realized he didn't know how to wash his hands. he meowed and would curl up in my lap (8 years old) instead of talking and sitting with other children. i fiercely loved this child. thinking of him now moves my heart so...
his mom was a bartender- at night. so which ever guy she had hooked up with would watch the boys while she worked. one threw his kitten against the wall and killed it. one took all the christmas presents we had bought for the boys and pawned them.
before meeting this child, i thought i was GREAT at loving people. but here i was, faced with a woman that i judged critically, and found only bad. so i- just as you are- began praying for her. everyday. several times a day. every time her son couldn't focus because of his childhood spent in front of the tv, i'd pray for her. and this went on and on. by the end of the school year i can say that i had genuine love for her. and she could tell. and this helped her more than anything else.

Momma Bear said...

wow that was very articulate. I can really relate to what you are saying.

jenny mae. said...

it's hard for me because i consider myself a naturally loving person. i really thought i was the type to give people a fair shake, even MORE than a fair shake before turning my back on them. i fiercely love the people i love and i thought that meant i was loving. it doesnt. it means that i'm good to the people i care about and that's it. im kind of a miserable example of love when it comes to loving the least, last and lost. but im trying and praying and looking to God to show me and transform me day by day.

Anonymous said...

I'm praying every day for you, honey. Just know that many, many are...He will show you what to do next-Jane A

Anonymous said...

Please make an anonymous call to the police about the poor child living next door to you. Too many children are severly injured, even killed because of child abuse that was ongoing, but never reported. This is very, very serious. I am sorry you are in this situation, but you have a responsibility to do something about this. NOW. I know from previous posts that you are worried about making this worse on the children involved by calling the police, but you could be saving their lives.