Sunday, July 12, 2009

numbers of my day

01. something else "funny" that happened at the farmers market yesterday was that i fell flat on my face in front of oh about 50 people. basically i was walking up the street towards the market holding a card table. as im passing a van one of the legs to the table pops down and jams into the wheel well of the van. what are the chances!!? it was a one in a million shot! so naturally it prevented me from advancing and i didn't even have time to put my hands down because i was holding onto the table. gravel in my hands and welts on my shins where i hit the bottom of the table - good times. it's funny, having so much attention drawn onto someone with an anxiety disorder is sort of cosmic joke. this is sort of the stuff we have nightmares about - but it was great. i didn't even get up off the ground yet and augustine was there with a glass of iced tea that he had bought for me from a lemonade stand. that made the physical and ego sting much easier to bear!

02. BIG NEWS! the columbus land bank finally called me back, after i've been hounding them since oh, april? to lease us an amazing plot of public land. so, in two weeks we will officially be in possession of land for our community garden. i was equal parts relieved and annoyed to talk to the man in charge of the land leases. i mean, righteous anger about the snails pace of things over there yes? i cannot explain how excited i am. AND they approved both of the possible garden layouts we proposed! we were concerned that because we do not publicly own the land we wouldn't be permitted to put permanent structures like compost bins, a shed, or even perennials down. all wrong! so im browsing sites to find deals on fruit bushes and trees in bulk.

03. i believe olive has inherited some of my sleep issues. i've always been a night owl but in college i developed insomnia which has waxed and waned in various seasons of my life. olive's issue is that it takes her forever - upwards of 2+ hours - to wind down at bedtime. we lay both kids down at 8 and there have been nights where olive will still be up in her bedroom romping around at 11pm. it leads to some very frustrating nights for david and i not to mention that we would therefore have no quiet time together if she is at the stairs asking to come down, etc. for 2+ hours. so upon the suggestion of a trusted friend, who gives it to her children and had it approved by multiple doctors, we've been experimenting with a low dose of melatonin. you wouldn't believe the difference in all of our evenings!! instead of the epic fight to get her to calm herself down and sleep, we usually now only have around 30 minutes of settle time, which is absolutely reasonable! i actually hugged my friend at church today, i was that thankful for her suggestion!

04. *sigh* someone broke into davids car last night and stole our veggie oil computer. there is no question in our minds who did it sadly (when david came home last night at around 1am there was a gathering outside an apartment). here is what i'm getting it - besides "this sucks!" -- be careful what you pray for. seriously. every week i pray for opportunities to not only hang out with my neighbors but invite them into the love of God by reflecting Jesus. hey, that's an invitation for hurt! literally we came home from church, discovered the break in, and not 5 minutes later we were talking with the neighbor in the back yard area while our kids played together. it was, difficult. i mean BIG ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM! im not being a jerk here or jumping to conclusions unjustly - they've already been in trouble for breaking into cars in our neighborhood sadly. anyways - so it's been a really practical exercise in putting my money where my mouth is. it is not comfortable to say "okay, i've learned what love and forgiveness looks like, now i've got to actually DO IT." oddly our conversation turned to food and i got to share with them about justice gardens and the neighbor quietly asked if they could get food and gosh, i mean my heart just exploded with compassion and heartbreak. no "thing" is more important than people however we have put up a flier explaining that what was taken was not a GPS or mp3 player and it is of no use to anyone other than those running their cars on the particular vegetable oil system we have and to PLEASE return it to the car no questions asked. i do not love the idea of forking over lots of $$$ for a replacement.

05. lance armstrong is still my pony in the tour de france. we've been anxiously watching it for days.


Anonymous said...

oh no!!! what a bummer about the vegetable oil computer! I hope you get it back soon.

Momma Bear said...

I've been following your struggles on here as you write them. The ones where you are trying to submit your heart, emotions and actions to the Lord in regards to loving others, the ones that are difficult to love. I know it's not easy, been in similar situations, I think you are doing a good job and I think it's really cool that you seem to have appropriate boundaries, a measure of protection that is God given, but yet still putting yourself out there to sacrifice and love ie. showing them Christs love.
Your continued perseverence in this area of loving your neighbors is very encouraging to me. I'm struggling with similar battles and your openness about your own struggle is helping me in small measures to keep moving forward in showing these folks Christ in some way.
Thanks for putting yourself out there and sharing openly.

Judy said...

oh no! I am sad that that happened to you. Our cars got broken into last year and I felt so violated. I pray that you will find peace in all of this Jenny.
Also, Andrew has been on Melatonin on and off for about a year. It seems like once he takes it for a week, it gets his sleep pattern back on track. He also uses it when we go away or when he goes to a friends home to sleep over.
I hope Olive can get back sleeping for you.