Monday, March 12, 2012

sick, teeth, 3 questions

102.9 temp
poor augustine can't seem to get well. last week? the week before? he threw up for a few hours, missed two days of school. he got better and returned to school then not three days later started a hacking cough. missed two days of school. cough persisted a few days then last night he got a fever that was 102.9, aka the highest fever either kid has ever had. so naturally i took his temperature every 30 minutes and laid my hands on him and prayed like a mad mama. my house was a rich blend of peppermint oil (fever reducer), oregano (immunostimulant), and on guard, which has this great cinnamon and clove smell. sometime in the night he fever broke and it's hovering around 99 now. fevers are kind of the one thing as a parent that i get a little antsy about.

also, augustine has his first loose tooth! the dude is almost 7 yrs old and it appears as if he is the last of his social group to start popping them out. i think his fever was making him a little emotional because when he figured out his tooth was loose he started bawling and curled up into a ball on my shoulder. i can only assume he thought it was going to hurt? truthfully we have an unhealthy relationship/knowledge of loosing teeth in this house being that olive has lost one to a cavity and one to the dog knocking it out. david soothed him pretty well and today he woke up with a renewed sense of excitement about it all.

the kid's birthdays are coming up (april 12 & 15) and we're having a low key make your own sundae party at our house. well i think it will be low key. augustine in particular is at an age where it's ambiguous whether a parent is going to drop their kid off and go or stay with them, both i'd be fine with. but if every parent stays and brings the siblings we're looking at a party of like 50 people or more. HI, THAT IS A LOT OF ICE CREAM. worse case scenario we buy too much (LOL AT TOO MUCH ICE CREAM!) and we have to endure eating it as a family. "oh no!"

i'm not progressing as much spiritually this lenten season as last year. it's hard for me not to compare seasons in my life. why am i even thinking about last year? our church often talks about tolstoy's three questions. the story is as follows:

The thought came to a certain king that he would never fail if he knew three things. These three things were

What is the best time to do each thing?
Who are the most important people to work with?
What is the most important thing to do at all times?

Many educated men attempted to answer the king's questions, but they all came up with different answers. The king decided that he needed to ask a wise hermit in a nearby village. The hermit would only see common folk, however, so the king disguised himself as a peasant and left his guards behind to see the hermit. The hermit was digging flower beds when the king arrived. The king asked his questions, but the hermit went on digging rather laboriously. The king offered to dig for him for a while. After digging for some time, the king again asked his questions. Before the hermit could answer, a man emerged from the woods. He was bleeding from a terrible stomach wound. The king tended to him, and they stayed the night in the hermit's hut. By the next day the wounded man was doing better, but was incredulous at the help he had received. The man confessed that he knew who the king was, and that the king had executed his brother and seized his property. He had come to kill the king, but the guards wounded him in the stomach. The man pledged allegiance to the king, and he went on his way. The king asked the hermit again for his answers, and the hermit responded that he had just had his questions answered.

The most important time is now. The present is the only time over which we have power.
The most important person is whoever you are with.
The most important thing is to do good to the person you are with.

that is what i am getting most from this lent. to stay present, to do good and be a life-giver to every person and every situation i find myself with. it is so easy to apply those three questions/answers to my anxious inner life, particularly the first part. anxiety is time travel, pulling me into the past to relieve pain or to the future to stress about what-ifs. either way it takes me from the moment i'm in right now. it's a constant battle but i'm trying to train myself and my spirit to unyolk itself from time traveling. i find myself being more present with my family lately. there have been several sermons at church lately about how we segment our lives into categories and see issues as staying in those categories, basically failing to see how our whole life is related. i realize how selfish and wretched i can be in my prayers. i ask for a heart of love for the least, last, and lost and yet i easily lose my temper with my children or husband when they aren't doing things my way. those things are wholly related and it is wrong of me to wish/pray blessing in one area when i am unwilling to give up myself in another area. does that make sense? i am being selfish with my patience and love and asking only for what i WANT but not trying in other areas. so instead of working and cleaning and playing games on my phone (biggest life suck everrrr) i am cuddling with the children more on the couch and listening to them with my whole attention. well, again TRYING.

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