Wednesday, May 19, 2010

a date, school's out, fillup4free

david and i were blessed with yet another date night on monday. two date in one week is unheard of post-children. (remember the days when you had no kids and could just chill out with your lovey whenever you wanted and do whatever you wanted? ahh those were kinda the days...) my friend judy, who is amazing and always helps me out when i'm in a pinch, came over and couch sat, while my puppy peed on her ill add, while the kids snoozed. we went to go see midlake at the wexner center. i crouched in the back feeling overwhelmed and panic-y for most of the show. i think i was just not used to being in a new space and one that was in the bowels of such a large building (it literally was a multiple minute walk to get from the front door, down the stairs, up the 200+ foot ramp, down a hallway, down 2 flights of stairs, and into the space. WHAT IF I HAVE TO LEAVE AND FREAK OUT? david is so gracious and flexible and protective in these moments, i never feel ashamed of losing myself in a panic attack and screeching that we have to leave. now.

i was so excited to hear this song, though i admit being disappointed that it had no violin when it was played live :(

& another ditty i enjoyed.

in other news, today was augustine's last day of preschool! i admit being a little sad that his preschool didn't have any sort of graduation program. i mean i'm in full parent-mode when im thinking about those little milestones. how cute they are to me and how much pride augustine feels (like his christmas performance at school where he kept eagerly waving at me). yesterday we went to oakland nursery, you know - where i live in the spring/summer..., and augustine picked out two different small flats of flowers and some colorful containers to give to his teachers as a thank you for being so full of joy and patience and tenderness throughout the year. he so purposefully pulled the flowers out one by one and put them in the mama-dug space in the soil. then i rolled out the tires in the backyard and filled them with topsoil and manure then put down the sweet potatoes with his help. he's such a little gardener, so eager to help and learn and get dirty.

after we were done some people who had contacted us from stopped by to get a tank refill and stretch their legs while they were traveling. that site is a network of veggie-powered car owners in the USA wherein you can contact people while you're out driving in another cities and as the name implies, get some oil. it's like one large veggie oil co-op. another group is coming into town next week to dip into our stash too, not that we mind. the idea of this site makes me really happy. oh, and the couple that stopped by, the woman was a midwife apprentice and they lived in a yurt!


dwk said...

Jenny, long time reader and I just wanted to say I totally know how bad panic attacks are and the fear of them. I suffered for years. It was scary not to mention exhausting. I too, had my amazing husbands support. He was (and will always be) my "safe" place. When I'm with him, he calms me and never makes me feel like a freak. Aren't we so blessed?! Anyway, I just want you to know you are not alone. I hope they fade for you as they have for me. I believe they will.

jenny mae. said...


sadly though i've had panic attacks for 10 years now. im grateful that the come in waves at least. sometimes i feel mostly okay and then as in the season of life im going through right now they are bad and chronic.

Kristin said...

Eeek a yurt!!! I love it! I'm sure you'll meet many interesting people this way :)

wncmatt said...

tHaNk YoU so much for the veg oil! It really helped to get our camper home. It's nice to stay in while we rebuild the yurt during these crazy thunderstorms.

Connie(the apprentice), matt, and teya!

jenny mae. said...

how was the rebuilding process? did you guys find a new place to put it on where it can be permanently? it was so nice meeting you guys!

wncmatt said...

We're not fully homed yet. The camper affords too much comfort for us to work quickly. It makes it easy to be lazy during these hot hot days!